June 17, 2013
It being Father’s Day today I wanted to share something very close to my heart. I’m not sure words can express the things I have felt or the things I have gone through as a mother, but I will certainly try my hardest to put them into words.
It all started with this beautiful girl below. I got pregnant with her at the age of 17. I was reckless and wild, but that didn’t stop me from wanting to be a mother. Out of decency, (or so I thought) I married the man who helped with the process. You’ll soon understand why I say it this way. Our life was rough and not in a “I wanna go out and party” way. We went through so much more than I can go into detail about but Lord knows I longed for her to have a father figure in her life. One day I gathered up the courage to leave.
I searched for that perfect father figure a little too hard. Guys came and went, but they were all wrong for HER.
And then I started seeing him. Someone I had so cruelly turned down many years before because of my vain attitude. Little did I know and most likely little did HE know that he was going to become a Father to a little precious girl. He was always meant to be her father.
He was so young and so not prepared. But it didn’t matter. They had a bond. Despite my fears, he continued to show me what a father really should be.
The day he adopted her is a day I will NEVER forget. The first words to come out of her mouth when we told her what was going on were, “Does this mean I can call him daddy?” I cried tears of joy.
Her question reminded me of my relationship with the Lord. It’s so hard for us to accept that we have an Abba Father that longs to be to us everything we’ve ever dreamed of. Someone that loves us with a love much deeper than any ocean. But oh how simple it truly is, just like my sweet child at just 6 years old said; “Does that mean I can call him daddy?” It does mean that. His arms are and always have been wide open and waiting. He wants to be the father we’ve always wanted and needed.
And how thankful I am to Paul for laying his life down and resembling Christ to my daughter, to our daughter. For showing her an earthly love she may have never known.
Happy Father’s Day Paul. We love you with every ounce of who we are. I owe you so much more than I could ever give back. You are and always will be the GREATEST dad next to my Abba Father.